How to Lag Behind your To-Do List
1. Watch BBC iPlayer and Youtube obsessively for 4 hours, with breaks only for chips and water.
2. Believe in blind faith that you still have one week to go, even though the days flash by within a blink.
3. Enjoy yourself by lying around with your warm down duvet.
4. Justify the reason you don't get out of your pyjamas is because the wind is howling outside and it's too cold for work or exercise.
5. Start calling jobless friends and joke about the weather, economics and politics for two hours.
6. Get distracted with Facebook, other people's blogs and emails.
7. Go to the library and borrow children's books in the name of research.
8. Pass yourself off as a penniless artist suffering for your art, and pray for money to come to you magically.
9. Believe in the Law of Attraction and spend the whole day dreaming about your ideal life....in bed.
10. Skype chat with your fiance for 3 hours until 4am.
11. Think that all of the above habits are healthy and wholesome, and supports your path towards your ideal life without action.
12. Then meditate to calm yourself down. For two hours of bliss.
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